Defying Gravity- Glee Cast
Tonight I Wanna Cry- Keith Urban
Jar of Hearts- Christina Perri
Need You Now- Lady Antebellum
Broken Road- Rascal Flatts
I Run to You- Lady Antebellum
Luckiest- Ben Folds Five
Feels Like Home- Chantel Kreviazuk
Not Fire, Not Ice- Ben Harper
This was the itunes play list that accompanied my bubble bath tonight. I have been feeling anxious and stressed and not myself lately. I'm sure a lot has to do with tons of crazy extra hormones. Even though the reason I have these hormones is welcome and loved, I don't like these feelings. It is like a roller coaster. Up and down all the time and feeling opposite pulls of my heart. I really do honestly love my life. My little family is my life and they are a wonderful source of joy. I have a fun job that if I have to work this is a great one to have. I get to see my little girl all the time, do fun things, and get paid for it. Really, it's not bad. I have a handful of good friends and I am thankful for you. But this is also a thorn in my heart. I have thought and often still feel like I need to try harder to be a better friend. I see others around me and they are wonderful examples to me of friendship. I was inspired by this quote that my cousin put on her blog.
"BE the person you want to remember, don't just remember the
person you want to be"
-Leigh Snow
Her blog went on to say: "There are so many people I meet in this life that I think to myself, "wow this person is so amazing, I want to be just like them." But then often times, the natural man kicks in, and I forget. So then I heard this quote yesterday from one of my friends and it hit me; Don't sit there wishing you could be more like someone you greatly admire, BE that person now. Take on their admirable qualities that you love so much NOW."
I really took this to heart. I need to work on myself and be that person that I want to remember and that I want others to see in me. Although try as I might, I have realize that sometimes people are just not going to like me and not want to be my friend. And as much as I hate that feeling, I need to be okay with that. All I can do is try and be nice. I can only control myself. These feelings were the reason for my bubble bath tonight. This may be personal and a bit rambling but I feel better now so thanks for not judging, thank you for being my friend.
2 comments:
Mel, I think you are a great friend and my best friend. There are some friends in your life that come and go, but you will never be one of them.
From your Father's perspective you are a wonderful, sweet an amazing Wife, Mother and Daughter. That has great Christ like talents and gifts that touch many life's. Many you'll never know.
Those of us that know you are the lucky ones, and better people because of who you are. You are special and loved by many. Thank you for being YOU.
I LOVE YOU. DAD
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